It took about three years to develop Velamentis on a bootstrap budget. During that time, while we didn’t have a digital presence, we were pleased we could help employees directly.
By phone, email, or conference calls, when we could carve out time, we would listen and discuss their situation, offer insights and potential paths to help them manage their experience, and see them move on, a little bit lighter.
There were some people that we kept in touch with longer, and some that stuck around to provide feedback on our work. It was cool experiencing a sense of community on a topic that is so often tough and triggering.
On the other end of the spectrum were the skeptics, the corporate acolytes, the well-meaning doubters, and the perplexed, “why-would-you-put-yourself-through-that?!” cynics.
I really can’t blame anyone for thinking we’re on a hopeless journey. At large is the looming reality that workplace environments don’t substantively change without motivation, usually in the form of negative exposure like a dire PR hit, loss of revenue, or employee acquisition / retention issue.
The average employee does not typically have the power to make a positive dent in toxic workplace cultures, or drive change in companies who’s executive leadership values do not effectively support mistreated or abused employees.
These same “leaders” certainly don’t give much time or credence to the idea that you could be traumatized in their place of work.
With these thoughts in mind, I was frequently asked, “Why are you even bothering?” Having experienced workplace trauma myself, and fortunate enough to have a level of support most do not receive, the decision to address workplace mistreatment was clear to me.
Despite the craziness of bootstrapping, it wasn’t a difficult choice. It made sense to provide resources that were extremely difficult for me to piece together, to help others solve this same problem. That’s the point.
We may not be able to rely on our workplaces to support us through terrible situations; however, we can (and should) help ourselves when our companies fail us.
It’s a level of accountability to ourselves that is powerful on its own because it can free us from the handcuffs we often feel we’re wearing when we live by the risk-management approach of companies. I believe very deeply in the power of self-help.
Helping ourselves, though, doesn’t come from some magical wish. I wasn’t really sure what I was experiencing when dealing with mistreatment. My gut told me that the level of discomfort I was feeling though, wasn’t (and shouldn’t) be normal.
Instinctually, I knew something was wrong; I didn’t know how to talk about or describe it until it was so wrong, it was obviously and devastatingly painful.
As I was working through my workplace trauma, I needed to figure that middle part out where I knew something was wrong and escalating but not sure how to practically analyze and manage the situation.
In hindsight, we realized that it would be helpful to develop and share a framework to help us consider what we are experiencing at work.
Working with the advisors on our team, and some terrific employment law attorneys, we are excited to share our mistreatment-misconduct framework.
This PDF is a quick reference guide that introduces the concepts of mistreatment and misconduct, and how they differ. It is intended to create an awareness of how to start thinking about negative experiences at work.
The next time that voice inside your head tells you something is off, don’t ignore it.
Jen
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Contributors:
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- Gary Whitmer: Subject Matter Expert
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